Wednesday, December 22, 2004

What Is It About This Cereal?

I know I'm bored but is that any excuse to be sitting here thinking about how much my bowl of Honey Bunches of Oats looks like horsefeed? We used to buy stuff that looked exactly like this in giant 100 pound sacks for our horses when I was a kid, and now here I am, 30 years later - eating the stuff? There's just something disturbing about it, I think I need to go back to Lucky Charms.

I went to a website today where you make these plans to meet with other people who share your interests. I couldn't find anyone in my area so I made a new group for people with panic attacks who live in my town. It surely would be nice if someone actually joined the damn thing. Even one or two people would be great. I always thought that a support group for people with panic attacks and agoraphobia was quite ironic considering that agoraphobic people can't leave their homes without a 'safe person' - if at all, people with social anxiety have difficulty making a phone call - so how the hell does anyone GET to the meeting? It's kind of funny if you think about it. Anyway, I adjusted the group meeting place a bit at the website and said that we'd meet online first to figure out how to handle the meeting in real life issue. I think that will work. Now I just have to promote it and get people to join and TALK TO ME!!!!

You watch...Dave says our date for moving is September 1st - I'll bet you any amount of money I find some incredibly nice person with severe panic and agoraphobia who lives like, a block from my house, we'll become best friends and then our family will have to move. That- that right there is my luck.

Oh, MAN did my doctor piss me off today. I truly believe that physicians get kickbacks of some sort for prescribing certain medicines, and here's why. I felt a cold sore developing on my lip and I do NOT want a cold sore for Christmas, no way - they are nasty. So, I called my doctor's office and asked the front desk chick if my doctor could just call something into the pharmacy or did I have to go in for a visit? She said she'd see what she could do, and that my doctor was getting ready to walk out the door so she had to hurry. I called my pharmacy a few hours later and asked if there was a prescription for me, there was. I asked what it was, Valtrex.

VALTREX??? If you've watched TV in the last year you've seen the commercials for this medicine - the one where the chick has GENITAL herpes and is all happy, riding a bike, swinging on a swing, swimming and getting all rammy with a guy in the ocean? Yeah - THAT'S what she prescribed to me for a fucking cold sore. I read the list of side effects - no fucking way. All I wanted was the same goddamn cream that everyone in the world gets prescribed for them for cold sores - that shit really works, and ONLY on the cold sore - not throughout your entire system, and there's not a pound of paper's worth of side effects or warnings either.

I was so pissed. Anyway, why would she prescribe that? Why not prescribe the one that does NOT cost $230 for a typical course of treatment? The stuff I wanted and had before - which worked - costs $40. I have insurance so THAT would have been ten bucks, but the stuff she called in would have been a $35 copay. Yeah, she's sure as hell getting kickbacks of some sort. That just makes me sick.

Doesn't ALL of the advertising shit in your doctor's office just piss you off? You might not be getting the best medicine, just the most-heavily pushed by the pharmaceutical reps medicine. You sign in with a Lexapro pen, you weigh in on a Zocor scale, there are pharmaceutical calendars, clocks, note pads, and even exam table covers - it's everywhere! I think there ought to be a fucking law against that shit. When I went to see my panic doctor, he had a really nice clock on his desk...Upon further inspection I noticed it said "Xanax XR" on it...guess what he prescribed to me? Xanax XR. Yeah, like he's not getting SOMETHING out of that. Right.

Anyway, so now I've got two little cold sores that I'm treating with $15 Abreva (non prescription) and I hope, I hope, I HOPE these damn things don't get all nasty looking because I was HOPING to take some Christmas pictures with my kids. That would have been nice.

Speaking of Christmas...It's now officially December 22nd. I quietly celebrated the solstice with a nod to the Universe and a moment of peaceful reflection. I am SO excited about Christmas Eve in 3 days ... We're going to watch movies, get silly, and eat shrimp - and then the big day - watching the kids open their presents...Little baby short decaf having his second Christmas and maybe being a bit more aware of what's going on...Giving the cat a gift of a mid sized cardboard box to lay in (he'll LOVE it, trust me.) I love, love, LOVE Christmas mornings with the kids!!

And did you ever wonder if there's a correlation between the fact that the Winter Solstice is so damn close to Christmas? I think I read something about that in the Da Vinci Code - I really need to read that book again. Except - I need the new version that's out this year, the one with the photos and more illustrations...I MUST HAVE IT!!!

So this is me blathering...woohoo...only one more day of school for tall decaf and then he's off of school for two weeks...Venti (hubby) is off for several days and I'll get to see grande decaf, too! I love that it's Christmas. Or solstice. Or whatever the hell you want to call it - I'm just so thrilled to be seeing my kids and my sister ... I can't wait. :)

Off to bed now in hopes that it will make it seem as though the time is flying by....


No comments: