Experiment

Fucking Ranch Dressing

I had to eat lunch by myself today. I bought a sandwich and a little salad - Ranch dressing packet came with it. I ate half of the sandwich in the atrium here at work, piano music in the background while I read a book. I couldn't take the anxiety of the situation any more, so I packed up my too big paper bag and went to my office. Salad time. This is the real Salad Shooter. The fucking ranch dressing packet squirted all over my goddamn sweater and office chair. So much for trying to eat healthily.

I am mad, sad, and disappointed with (or because of) my sister. She was going to come and live here with me for a while. We were going to help each other out.
I am sad because of my son. He moved 3,000 miles away to live with his father. Mere days before his 18th birthday.
My mother lied to me last night.
I haven't had sex with my husband in too long. (Not by choice, really.)
I have no money. Well, less than no money.
Christmas isn't going to be a good one. Again.
My paycheck on the 15th is going to be 1/2 it's normal size because I missed work a lot because of snow.
My husband is manic about money.
My son's math teacher is being a bitch to him for no reason. I would like to smack her.
My left foot now hurts - after I badly, badly twisted both of my feet - not ankles - feet. The right one healed, now the left one hurts like a bitch. It's hard to walk.
This $5.25 sandwich is dry as fuck. They gave me one miniscule mayo packet.
My ex husband won't call me back or send the cell phone our son has back to me.
My cell phone bill is $830 ($500 and some just this last billing period) because of my son.
I will cry when I lose my cell phone.
I only have 2 minutes of lunch-time left. Or is it 12? I don't remember what time I left for lunch. :(
I'm still so very, very, very lonely.

So I didn't not need the glob of ranch dressing on my sweater today.

Back to work.