It's 2 AM and I have to be at my family doctor's office at 8:30. I've been trying to sleep since 11:30 with absolutely no success. The reason I am going to my family doctor is to see if she will refill my prescription for xanax so that I can make it across the country on our 7-day drive. I haven't seen her in two years, I think it's been. I do know, however, that ever since I had that BIG panic attack on August 12th I've been having a REALLY damn hard time driving in a car anywhere that is too far from home. I have been panicking alot lately. I'm trying to be strong, but it's just not working all too well.
So, my mind is just racing. There's so much to do that most days I do more sitting and planning than actual "stuff" to get ready for this move.
We leave in 9 days. Jesus Christ. Can that be right? I guess it is - we're leaving sometime during the day on the 17th, with our first stop being Columbus, Ohio - I think. We still haven't secured our exact travel plans.
Man, I wish I could sleep. I already know I look like shit - because I feel like shit. I've been really working my ass off these past few days. I hope my doctor is nice because I can't take a single other person being a prick to me. Our landlord, and her daughter, were just such assholes over the weekend that I think I'm still feel the anxiety from that. I actually yelled at her daughter for using threatening words to Grande - who is 14 years old. She said something about calling the police and having them get over to our house. We were not at home at the time, but fortunately, were just down the street. Grande called me on my cell phone and was terrified.
Why would our landlord's daughter be threatening to call the police? I'm not sure. We haven't done anything illegal other than not pay rent yet. It was due on the 5th day of the month, but there she was on our steps waiting to attack us verbally on the 4th day of the month. Bitch. I really let her have it for scaring the shit out of my son. God, I hate people here.
So then our actual landlord calls us on Sunday morning - very early on Sunday morning, and tells us that we cannot leave until we pay for September's rent. She said she would have the police come and make us not be able to leave. Yes - actually barricade us in the house. You might have to understand that she MAY still think she's in Vietnam, or wherever the fuck she's from. Venti told her she'd go to jail for doing that, and that this is America, and blah, blah, blah...but it still upset me really badly. Well, it upset everyone really badly.
Sometimes 9 days seems way, way, way too long.
We've been invited to 2 going-away parties this weekend. We don't have time to go, but they are relatives and friends - so what choice do we have? None. I'm really, really scared about the drive to see my family - which is about 3 1/2 hours from here. We really needed that time to finish packing, cleaning, and painting because uber-bitch landlord will be here on Tuesday night for an inspection.
No wonder I can't sleep. Who WOULD be able to sleep??
My camera broke. It would figure that it would considering that, as I mentioned in an earlier post, have become addicted (let's call it a hobby) to Morguefile.com - I love taking pictures. Anyway, Venti took my camera back to Costco and they didn't even ask any questions - they just traded it in for the same one I had. No questions asked. Weird. Good, but weird. I was really bummed thinking I wouldn't have my camera for the trip. Panicking or not, I plan on taking pictures.
Well, I guess I ought to try and sleep again.
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